Humor Files - 25to30

You Are Probably Aged 25 - 30 If....

You wore anything Izod, especially those windbreakers that
    folded up into a pouch you could wear around your waist.

You owned a Jordache anything, or you remember when Jordache
    jeans were cool.

In your sophomore class picture, you're wearing an Izod shirt
    with the collar "up."

Your "dressy" wardrobe centered on pastels and linen blazers -
    guys included.

You know, by heart, the words to a "Weird" Al Yankovic song.

You remember when Madonna was just hitting the scene.

The Brady Bunch movie brought back cool memories.

"The Reflex" was a cool song.

You remember "Battlestar Galactica."

Three words: "Atari," "Apple," and "Pong."

You remember the days that hooking your computer into your
    television wasn't an expensive option that required gadgets - it was
    the ONLY option.

You remember the original version of Windows: Macintosh.

You remember the days when "safe sex" meant "my parents are gone
    for the weekend."

You thought "Weird Science" was a masterpiece.

You remember any or all of the following:  Echo & the Bunnymen,
    Cutting Crew, Scritti Politti, or Orchestral Maneuvers in the Dark.

Chevy Chase was really funny in those vacation movies.

You remember "Friday Night Videos" before the days of MTV.

A predominant color in your childhood photos is "plaid."

While in high school, you and all your friends discussed
    elaborate plans to get together again at the end of the century and
    play "1999" by Prince over and over again.

You remember when music that was labeled "alternative" really
    was.

You took family trips BEFORE the invention of the mini-van.

You rode in the back of the station wagon and you faced the cars
    behind you in the "tail gunner" position.

You've recently horrified yourself by using any one of the
    following phases: - "When I was younger"  - "When I was your age" -
    "You know, back when..." - "Just can't (fill in the blank) like
I       used to"

Schoolhouse Rock played a HUGE part in how you actually learned
    the English language.

You ever dressed to emulate a person you saw in either a Duran
    Duran, Madonna, Rick Springfield, or Cyndi Lauper video.

You actually know who Rick Springfield is.

You remember with pain the sad day when the Green Machine hit
    the streets and made your old Big Wheel obsolete.

The phrase "Where's the beef?" still doubles you over with
    laughter.

You remember when film critics raved that no movie could ever
    possibly get better special effects than those in the movie TRON.

You jammed to the Miami Vice theme and thought Jan Hammer was
    cool.

You wanted to move to Hawaii because that's where Magnum lived.

For the girl crazy bunch: Your first sexual dream occurred to
    thoughts of Jeannie, Marsha Brady, Samantha from Bewitched or, for
    those hard-core comic fans out there, Daphne from Scooby Doo,
Josie     or any one of her Pussycats

And for the boy crazy bunch: You thought Sean Cassidy was
    "dreamy", lusted after "Ted, your ship's photographer" on the Love
    Boat and Chachi, or, to keep it fair to the comically interested,
    thought Fred was just a hunk on Scooby Doo.

Your hair, at some point in time in the 80's, became something
    which can only be described by the phrase "I was experimenting."

Guys: You remember when a guy piercing his ear was radical to
    the max, but did it anyhow.

This timeline appropriately describes actual events in your
    life: Star Wars opens, you are still in single digit ages, and you
    think the creatures are WAY cool.  Empire Strikes Back opens,
    you are now in early double digit ages, and you are convinced
    that the special effects are much better, the characters are
    cool, and you want one of every collectible out there. Return of the
    Jedi hits the theaters...you are now a teenager, and you cannot get
    your eyes off Princess Lea's breasts/Han Solo's butt.

You've ever shopped at a Banana Republic or Benetton, but not in
    the last five years, okay?

You actually remember Benetton.

You're starting to believe (now that it wouldn't affect YOU)
    that maybe having the kids go to school year-round wouldn't be
    such a bad idea after all.

You're doing absolutely nothing with anything pertaining to your
    major degree.

You ever wanted to be gagged with a spoon

U2 is too "popular" and "mainstream" for you now.

You owned a Trapper Keeper.

You remember when there was only "G, PG and R", none of this
    PG-13 crap.

You learned to swim about the same time Jaws came out and still
    carry the emotional scars to this day.

Wonder twin powers, activate . . . form of an iceberg, shape of
    a hammer.

You spent endless nights dreaming about being the Bionic
    Woman/Man or Wonder Woman/the Incredible Hulk.

You remember "Hey, let's be careful out there."

You ever wanted to learn to play "Stairway to Heaven" on the
    guitar and choreographed "Dancing Queen" by yourself in your room.

You know all the words to the double album set of Grease.

"All-skate, change directions" means something to you.

You ever rang someone's doorbell and said "Landshark."

You bought a pair of Vanns and wanted to order a pizza in
    history class so you could be just like Jeff Spicoli in Fast
    Times as Ridgemont High.